The Kardashian Christmas card review.

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This is by far one of the most terrifying things that I have ever seen in my life. This is worse than the photoshopped one last year that they had. I just really do not understand this. Where is Rob? Where is Scott? Where is Kanye? Where is North? I have a lot of questions about this one. If you are looking for Bruce he is the woman frozen in the cashier booth. I just honestly wonder how the fuck they came up with this idea. Look at poor Kylie, she is emotionless because she knows how horrible this is going to look.

No but seriously, where is Rob? Did they realize that the public would realize how photoshopped he was in this so they decided not to add him? I swear this family forgets about the men in their family and that shit just ain’t right!

No but for real I would understand this more if they said it was a circus more like a casino, This card makes me want to vomit. I bet Kim will come out and saw that her body wasn’t photoshopped in here either.

Kim K is a good mother and wants everyone to know it!

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After someone called Kim K an absentee mother she had this to say.

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Now I must laugh when I read this because it seems like this guy really struck a nerve with Kim. I must ask though, why did she say that she doesn’t tweet her every move? I feel like it is her job to instagram and tweet every single thing she does. Also when the baby goes to sleep she allowed to go out and work? So during all of Kanye’s shows this baby is fast asleep? I hope that she isn’t leaving little North in a crib all alone! Kim your first public picture with her a nanny was carrying your child which isn’t a good look.

Honestly I feel bad for little North West, I understand she is already richer than I will ever be but at least my parents aren’t egotistical maniacs. Right now Kanye is literally losing his shit calling Kim K the next Marilyn Monroe and telling people their love should make them believe in love. I am worried Yeezus is sipping on that Tiger Blood that Charlie Sheen has been drinking.

Kim, it looks like this tweeter really upset you, maybe because it is true? You don’t need to watch Yeezus wear a mask and scream every single night. Also don’t say you aren’t constantly tweeting because that is just a lie.

Bound 3: James Franco and Seth Rogen

I am not going to sit here and say that I am James Franco’s biggest fan because I’m not. I think that if I sat down with him he would just stroke my leg and tell me things about art, I just think he is a bit off. Seth Rogen is hilarious with his weird Grover like voice though. Anyway as I sat down to watch this video they made as a parody to Bound 2 where Kimye have weird sex on a bike. (Also Kim K is digitally altered in that video don’t let anyone tell you different)

As the video started I spit out my coffee and I wasn’t even drinking any. I mean that whole group of friends Jonah Hill, James Franco, Seth Rogen, Jay whatever his last name is, they have all made out at one point or another. This time it was just on film. I like to think that James and Seth make a better couple than Kim and Kanye after watching this.

This was brilliant, bravo James Franco. This was much better than your weird Bieber parody.

There is no way this is Kim Kardashian’s body.

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Apparently Yeezus has a new music video where Kim K is supposed to be riding him as he rides a motorcycle. The background is very Not A Girl Not Yet  a Woman circa 2001 but that isnt the point. The point is that there is absolutely no way that this is Kim Kardashian’s body. Now let me say that I think Kim K is a scummy person who relies on Photoshop for everything but she has a nice body, I can give her that. There is just absolutely no way that this is her body, no way. She has curves, she is known for having curves! I honestly didn’t realize that they could make you look skinner in videos either. I can’t wait for Yeezus to have an angry rant about people saying it isn’t her real body. Considering she has always been more curvy there is no way, NO WAY, that this is her. They probably just put her face on the body like they did for Natalie Portman in Black Swan.

I am just going to post a picture Kim K the other night where she is looking curvy and healthy rather than photoshopped and skinny.

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