Joe Jonas Channels His Inner..Zayn Malik?

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Well TMZ said it best, Joe Jonas seems to be trying to steal Zayn Malik‘s look. It is kind of uncomfortable the resemblance between the two with this haircut. I mean Zayn is better looking by far, but again it is uncomfortable.

Ever since Joe and Gigi’s break up he has gone to make sure to unfollow Zayn and Gigi along with deleting photos with each of them.

I guess I have to ask, who wore it best? I guess Gigi would be the best judge.

Let me just rant real fast about Joe Jonas, okay? He is the definition of someone who tries too hard. A few years ago he went on to talk about how he wouldn’t lose his virginity to the crazy girl, throwing shade at T.Swift of course, now he is in some weird band and constantly dyes his hair. Be original Joe, it isn’t cute to copy your ex-girlfriends new boyfriend.

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Gigi Hadid & Joe Jonas Have Called It Quits After 5 Months

Oh young love, it happens so quickly and ends even quicker. Good for Gigi Hadid. I am going to assume that she broke up with him. Let’s be real, she is about to walk the run way at the Victoria’s Secret Show and Joe Jonas is eating cake by the ocean so I mean it makes sense.

Gigi is probably going to be a huge model, I mean she is already one of the youngest and hottest models out there, don’t tie yourself down girl. If you are going to, at least date the hot Jonas brother. If you were thinking Kevin, I meant Nick, duh!

Truthfully ever since I found out that Joe asked her out when he was 19 and she was 13, I have had a creepy vibe about him. I mean that is a serious age difference at the time. It is actually pretty gross. Think about it, that’s a freshman in college asking out a freshman in high school. Okay, moving on.

Call me crazy but I really think these two will be just fine.

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Joe Jonas’ New Band DNCE Releases First Single, ‘Cake By The Ocean’, Listen Here!

First of all, I didn’t even know that Joe Jonas was a part of a new band, let me just throw that out there. I feel like I am not doing my job right now being blindsided by this new band and song all in one day.

I don’t hate this song, I really don’t. I don’t love this song either. I guess I would probably change it if it was on the radio and I was sober, but if I was drunk at a dance floor I would most likely dance to it. I just kind of have no feelings forwards this song. It isn’t bad, it isn’t great.

Joe Jonas needs to realize one thing though, Nick Jonas is currently the supreme Jonas. There is no way that Joe is going to knock Nick off of the pedestal that he is currently standing on. Joe should wait until the Nick’s flame dims just a bit before he goes out and releases new music.

Check out the song below and let me know what you think here, do you hate it? Do you love it? Should I love it? I don’t know how I feel about this song and I need to know how I should feel.

Taylor Swift & Calvin Harris Join Gigi Hadid & Joe Jonas On Boat Ride Through London!

Taylor Swift, Calvin Harris Join Pals Gigi Hadid and Joe Jonas for a Boat Ride in London

So Taylor Swift has been doing her European leg of the ‘1989’ tour and clearly has been having a great time. Know who else is having a great time, Calvin Harris and Karlie Kloss. Joe Jonas on the other hand? Well he looks pretty damn miserable and I think that I know why. If you think about it, after he broke up with Taylor Swift his career went way down hill. He had the potential to be the Jonas Brother to really break out, but he didn’t because he broke up with America’s sweetheart T.Swift and she wrote a ton of songs to remind everyone that he broke her heart. Now he is dating her good friend Gigi Hadid, who is a model or something, and has to see T.Swift constantly.

Apparently Swift’s parents were also along for the ride, so Karlie wasn’t just a fifth wheel, she was a seventh wheel! What a trooper!

I still can’t get over Joe Jonas though, he is so miserable because Nick is now the hottest Jonas and he will never have a solo career. All because T.Swift completely ruined him.

Seriously though, who is Gigi Hadid?

Demi Lovato Posts Hilarious Instagram Picture Of Joe Jonas & Miley Cyrus To Celebrate 420!

“In honor of our former escapades, I thought you’d like this to remember your first blaze.. Happy #420 @joejonas. #disneyhighclassof09,”

Oh 420, it brings out the stoner in everyone. The now sober Demi posted this photo in honor of the day that is known for smoking weed, more than any other average day. If you can remember Joe mentioned that the first time he smoked weed was with Demi and Miley back in the day. (https://lagunabiotchcelebritea.wordpress.com/2013/12/02/joe-jonas-lost-his-v-card-at-20-and-smoked-weed-with-miley/) Back when he was trying to be relevant again, remember that? Well Demi did, and decided to post this today.

Honestly, Demi is awesome. I wish she tagged Miley too but I am going to assume that these two had a falling out at some point. Probably when Demi wanted to live a sober life and Miley, well she was just being Miley.

Happy 420 y’all!

Kevin & Joe Jonas Are Hitting The Road Together For Intimate Theater Tour

ImageSo according to a few different sources, mainly Ryan Seacrest, the two of the three Jonas Brothers will be heading on tour. Now I really have no idea what is even going to happen for this tour. Apparently they will have a live talk session and some how the audience will be involved? Could you think of anything more boring than watching the two uglier Jonas Brothers talk to you about how you can better your life? Bitch you guys ain’t Oprah!

So far they had just three dates down which are in Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and Delaware. Random states right? I think they are from New Jersey so that makes sense but could they not find any other places to go? Can you even imagine how they pitched this show to their agents. Something about how they can’t get back together as a band just yet because Nick is getting all sexy for a movie, so they will just go on stage and talk! Yea, people will love it. Wrong.

I have an honest question, will this thing sell out? Do the Jonas Brothers minus Nick, still have fans? Please let me know! No seriously, tell me, I want to know.

Although the band decided to take a break in October, Kevin and Joe announced on Tuesday that they are set to embark on a three-date theater tour called Off the Record, which will be “an intimate, interactive, live talk event, and will also incorporate audience participation,” according to the press release.

The three dates will be June 5 at iPlay America in Freehold, New Jersey, June 7 at the Keswick Theatre in Philadelphia, and June 8 at The Grand in Wilmington, Delaware.

– See more at: http://www.ryanseacrest.com/2014/04/29/kevin-and-joe-jonas-announce-3-date-off-the-record-tour/?utm_campaign=tweets&utm_medium=twitter&utm_source=twitter#sthash.hZ0wG28n.dpuf

Although the band decided to take a break in October, Kevin and Joe announced on Tuesday that they are set to embark on a three-date theater tour called Off the Record, which will be “an intimate, interactive, live talk event, and will also incorporate audience participation,” according to the press release.

The three dates will be June 5 at iPlay America in Freehold, New Jersey, June 7 at the Keswick Theatre in Philadelphia, and June 8 at The Grand in Wilmington, Delaware.

– See more at: http://www.ryanseacrest.com/2014/04/29/kevin-and-joe-jonas-announce-3-date-off-the-record-tour/?utm_campaign=tweets&utm_medium=twitter&utm_source=twitter#sthash.hZ0wG28n.dpuf

Although the band decided to take a break in October, Kevin and Joe announced on Tuesday that they are set to embark on a three-date theater tour called Off the Record, which will be “an intimate, interactive, live talk event, and will also incorporate audience participation,” according to the press release.

The three dates will be June 5 at iPlay America in Freehold, New Jersey, June 7 at the Keswick Theatre in Philadelphia, and June 8 at The Grand in Wilmington, Delaware.

– See more at: http://www.ryanseacrest.com/2014/04/29/kevin-and-joe-jonas-announce-3-date-off-the-record-tour/?utm_campaign=tweets&utm_medium=twitter&utm_source=twitter#sthash.hZ0wG28n.dpuf

Well Hello There Nick Jonas

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So I have a real question for everyone, when the fuck did Nick Jonas get hot? I mean seriously, this guy is good looking now. He is the best looking out of the Chia Pet brothers that is for sure! I was just trolling through random websites and found out that he was on an episode of Hawaii 5-0, cool let me google that too! Then I found this pictures. Well damn Nick Jonas puberty was good to you.

Now I am a bit old for the Jonas Brothers, I was never a huge fan of them or anything. I thought they were all ugly. Kevin Jonas is somehow married even though him and his wife probably share the same skinny jeans. Joe Jonas is a hopeless wanna be that will never be. Then there is this little one, Nick Jonas. You beautiful little man! Yes, I approve of you!

So here you go readers, look at how much this guy grew up, proud of you Nick Jonas! Keep eating whatever you are eating because let me tell you, it is working for you.

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PS…Demi Lovato, date this guy. You two would be beautiful together.

Joe Jonas continues to look desperate

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Joe Jonas chats with NYMag about life after the Jonas Brothers in their new issue, on stands now.

The 24-year-old musician opens up about his relationships with his brothers, Nick and Kevin, former flame and friend Demi Lovato and the future. Check it:

On dating Demi: “One relationship that meant a lot to fans was the one I had with Demi Lovato, who I’ve known for years. We had been friends forever, we were both Disney kids, and because we played a couple in the Camp Rock Disney Channel specials—and fans liked seeing us together—we eventually dated for a month. I really got to know her and got to see the ins and outs of what she was struggling with, like drug abuse. I felt like I needed to take care of her, but at the same time I was living a lie, because I wasn’t happy but felt like I had to stay in it for her, because she needed help. I couldn’t express any of that, of course, because I had a brand to protect.”

If there is one thing that my readers should know about me is that Demi Lovato is my girl. She went crazy for a little while but came back and made a fucking comeback. She is better than ever now. Joe Jonas is trying to fucking ruin that. I read some of his interview earlier and posted it but this one is fucking trash. There is no reason to bring up Demi’s downfall again especially when you already said the poor little 15 year old made you smoke pot, you little bitch Joe Jonas!
I don’t even want to give him anymore of my time writing because I know that he is doing this simply because he has nothing how that the Jonas Brothers are over, it is obvious.
Joe you lost it all when you broke up with Taylor Swift and then dumped Demi as well. He says he stayed with her because he felt bad for her when in reality he started to date Ashley Greene like 5 minutes after they broke up sooo I don’t know what he is talking about.
Joe stop trying to make a solo career happen, it’s not going to happen!

Joe Jonas lost his V-card at 20 and smoked weed with Miley

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Joe Jonas opens up about sex, drugs, and the Jonas Brothers breakup in this brand new piece he penned for Vulture.

Here’s what the 24-year-old singer had to share with the site:

On losing his virginity: “We decided to take the rings off a few years ago. I lost my virginity when I was 20. I did other stuff before then, but I was sexually active at 20. I’m glad I waited for the right person, because you look back and you go, ‘That girl was batshit crazy. I’m glad I didn’t go there.’”

On experimenting with pot: “The first time I smoked weed was with Demi [Lovato] and Miley [Cyrus]. I must have been 17 or 18. They kept saying, ‘Try it! Try it!’ so I gave it a shot, and it was all right. I don’t even smoke weed that often anymore. I was caught drinking when I was 16 or 17, and I thought the world was going to collapse. But I was in another country, and it was legal there. My 21st birthday, I fell down a flight of stairs. I was unconscious that time, and my whole team was scared to death that somebody was going to get a picture. Now I appreciate wine or a vodka-soda at the end of the day every once in a while.”

On his relationships: “When I was 20, I started dating Ashley Greene, and she was my first serious relationship. We were together for almost a year. I was living out in L.A. by myself, and at the end of the day, long distance didn’t work. It’s incredibly difficult. I did a cover story with Details acknowledging the relationship, and the day after it was on newsstands, we announced our breakup. That was just coincidence, but it’s funny how that always happens, right? After Ashley, I took two or three years to just be single. I was hooking up and having fun. Now I’m with someone I really care about. We get each other.”

On hooking up with fans: “And, yes, I’ve dated fans. I can’t say that I’ve never put a foot in that world; there were times when I definitely took advantage of the opportunities I had. I remember I invited a fan to a movie, and we just made out the entire time.”

For more on Joe, visit Vulture.com!

This is probably one of my favorite thigns of all time. Hoe fucking desperate is Joe Jonas? I mean for real. The other two Jonas brothers have always known that they were just Jonas Brothers. Nick is on Broadway or something while Kevin is married and on reality tv. Joe thinks that he is Justin Timberlake or something when in reality he is just a Jc Chasez,not good enough to be a solo artist.

My favorite part of this whole thing is obviously the smoking weed thing. I will say Demi’s head may explode from this since she has been telling the world she is reformed and this is just shining a big ol spotlight on her wild teenage years. Miley on the other hand is only mentioned because she is relevant. Joe Jonas is probably sitting there just waiting to name drop so he can use her name! I am also surprised he didn’t throw T.Swift’s name in there since he likes to talk about her as much as possible.

Then we have Ashley Greene, the slut of Hollywood. Everyone knows who she is for the wrong reasons. She had about 5 lines in the entire Twilight series and she has also fucked all of Hollywood. She took Joe Jonas’ virginity then probably broke up with him immediately after. If I was Joe I would have just said Demi Lovato or Taylor Swift took my virginity and just roll with it. Also what a badass making out with fans right?! Please, Bieber is bringing them back to have orgies with strippers, you are not using anything to your advantage Joe Jonas.

Anyway, I really hope that Joe Jonas realizes that he is nothing but a serious joke. No one will ever take you seriously even if you name drop like a motherfucker. Joe Jonas, you will never be as famous as you think you should be.

Haylor 2.0?

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So there are so new reports that Taylor Swift and Harry Styles are possibly back on, I don’t believe it for a second but these “sources” are sure of it. There are also websites reporting that Taylor would never give Harry another shot which would be a wise move on her part. T.Swift bad mouthed him up and down and would look like an absolute chump if she got back with him. That would be like if she went back to dating Joe Jonas.

These two has a whirlwind like 3 month romance last year and it ended up the saddest picture of all time. They were apparently in the Virgin Islands and there is just a picture of T.Swift leaving all alone, how sad. Just makes a fan want to cry.

According these “sources” though T.Swift wants to move to England and wants Harry to help find her an apartment. Harry apparently sexts her nonstop too which is hilarious. I honestly think that Harry can get anyone he wants and considering he just got photographed with Kendall “Look at my tits” Jenner I don’t think he is thinking about the tall blonde who is known for writing about her terrible break ups. Apparently though Harry wrote some song about T.Swift and wants her back.

I don’t believe any of it but I figured it was worth writing about. If it is true, T.Swift look at this picture and just remember how sad you were.

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