Most people have no idea who Kellan Lutz with but he is one of the best kept secrets in the world. Seriously, Kellan Lutz is fucking gorgeous and I am proud of my girl Miley if this is true. So he showed up at the Jingle Ball concert in NYC and now he was just spotted coming off of Miley’s private jet from Miami. Now at first I thought that it was just random but I would like to think differently. My first point is, do you really think that Miley would let some random onto her plane? No, I don’t think so.
I read somewhere that a website said that today would be random, which isn’t true at all. Let’s see she just broke up with Liam, a tall hot blonde dude. Guess what Kellan is? A tall, hot and buff blonde guy. I mean come on, that is basically a match made in heaven. He is fucking gorgeous. She is gorgeous.
In my opinion I think Miley should settle down with him because why the fuck not? It would stop rumors about her and Juicy J and shit like that. Anyway, brava Miley, Kellan is easily one of the hottest guys in Hollywood that isn’t recognized enough.
Alright so there are something things that I will just never understand when it comes to Hollywood. The relationship between Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart is probably close to being at the very top of this list for many reasons.
1. She cheated on you bro, she cheated on you hard and she didn’t even try and hide it. Remember those weird pictures of her being hugged from behind by that creepy director? Then you guys got back together right in time for the final Twilight movie? Hm makes no sense to me!
2. They break up at least once a year for months at a time. Hey, if you want to be an on again off again couple that is absolutely fine with me. At this point though they have been dating for as long as they have been broken up, enough of this nonsense and make up ya damn mind kids!
3. Why Kristen Stewart? My theory is that she has a magical vagina that sings sweet melodies that only Robert Pattinson and dogs can hear. She seems like a wet blanket. She would be that girl at the party who stood in the corner and crossed her arms over her chest just looking around the party while Pattinson danced the night away. She would also be the girl to pull him away from talking to other girls even though she openly cheated on him.
Anyway this couple is apparently dating again and I know that Twilight fans are probably losing their shit. So I guess congrats even though she openly cheated on you and you kind of look like a little bitch right now.
Just a side note can you imagine how much Robert’s family probably dislikes K.Stew. I mean she made their son look like an absolute fool. Just a thought, I would love to be a fly on the wall at family gatherings.
Apparently some old washed up video vixen who was engaged to Tommy Lee decided to come out and talk about her sex life. She wrote some autobiography about how sad she was when Tommy went with Pam and all of this other boring stuff. When I first heard about her I figured that she would be irrelevant to my life until I read her quote about spending a night with a 19 year old Leonardo DiCaprio.
“I unbuttoned his jeans and tugged down on his boxers,” Bobbie, who was twenty-six at the time, wrote in the book (via The Daily Mail). “(What) I saw made me gasp. It made no sense. The kid put Tommy Lee to shame.” It goes to to read “Waves of satisfaction rippled through my body. If only Tommy Lee could see me now. He was a unicorn. Rare, innocent, and horny. Me, on the other hand, I’d been engaged, married and had given birth. I needed a man, not a man-child,” she added.
Using the term unicorn to describe Leo is my new favorite thing in the world. A unicorn is a rare, innocent, and horny creature. Dear God is there any better way to put it? Also reading this makes sense on how he continues to get so many women even though he is starting to look a bit bloated in his face. That and the fact he was Jack fucking Dawson, the ultimate dream boat. May I add that she says he puts Tommy Lee to shame, if you haven’t seen the porno he basically steers the boat with his penis. So thank you Bobbie whoever you are for describing a young Leonardo DiCaprio as a unicorn. I would use that term for an older Leonardo DiCaprio as well considering he is an incredible actor who will never win an Oscar.
Oh Leo, such a unicorn.